rope jokes

[LJ]

Okay all your joke and riddle experts - I need a few ideas again.  I have a Blue and Gold banquest to perform for and need a few rope jokes.  I am planning to use the one about the rope going to the restaurant, but was hoping for a couple more.  One of my characters always talks in jokes and riddles - he starts out supposedly telling something "factual" about a certain subject - in this case rope - and then it actually turns out to be a joke or riddle.  Any help is appreciated!!

[Chris Arveson]

There were 11 women hanging onto a rope that was hanging down a cliff. Ten were blonde, and one was a brunette. They all decided that one person should let go because if they didn't then the rope would break and everyone would die. No one could decide who should go, so finally the brunette thought to herself "I'll let go."
After a really touching speech from the brunette saying she would let go, all of the blondes started clapping.

OK, so change it to eleven Cub Scouts hanging on the rope. One was a Webelo, the rest were Wolves. . .

[Chris Arveson]

You can tell about the "weather rope." You can tell the weather by the rope. If it's still, the weather is calm. If the rope is swaying it is windy. If the rope is wet, it's raining. If it's shaking there's an earthquake. If it's gone, it's a tornado.

[Chris Arveson]

George: Have you heard the joke about the jump rope?

Fred: Skip it.

[Billy D. Fuller]

I was walking past a mental hospital one day and I saw one of the nutters dragging a piece of rope around.
I asked him why he was dragging the rope around and he said, "because I can't push it around stupid !"

These are funny...............


<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?hrwrQoRxzxo" target="youtube">YouTube Video</a>

I couldn't get this one to show in this post

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-_15G4Y11dY

Billy D.

[LJ]

Once again you all are the BEST!!  Some great ideas!!  Now I just have to get writing!!  THANKS!!
Achan says thanks too!!